DO YOU REMEMBER

I once authored a blog that was once proactive and some may have called it inspirational. I want to go back to that, but with growth and some new outtakes on life. I took a very long hiatus (3 years, 2 months, and 5 days to be exact) I no longer enjoyed what I wrote and I wasn’t mentally committed to producing content for the sake of a scheduled post. Needless to say, I was over it. I was encapsulated in the fear of judgment that sucked the living creativity out of me. It was visual gratification that lead to very little substance. I think the reason why I've been having such writer's block is that I am still trying to figure out how my experiences have affected me. I've learned to live in the present and enjoy the moment in all its translucence. For the longest time, I've been predisposed to thinking that something is always bound to go wrong. I can't tell you how often I've been preoccupied with what might happen versus enjoying what is happening. My facade seemed like a lifetime ago. Everyone has a history and for a while I allowed it to define me. I've grown to be decisive with the smallest details because I know I won't settle for anything less than my worth - know your worth.

The hiatus has allowed me to live authentically. The emphasis was removing the filtered lens and living life to my standard and not on a fabricated perception. I did not have the pressures of social media dictating my life. Experiencing growth without interruption were the most transformative years of my life. I feel energized and inspired, therefore I can perform on this platform with authenticity and credibility. I am willing to expose my idiosyncrasies and perhaps share an opinion or two. Writing had always felt cathartic, but now I can better articulate my thoughts. I am learning that no one can judge you for your experiences simply because they haven't lived your life. You learn that negativity is not a reflection of something you did, but rather the deflection of what the individual feels about themselves. Writing is simply a vehicle to reminiscence a memory or illustrate a thought. Sometimes it comes easily to me and at other times it's paralyzing.

Most importantly I want to give a shout out to my readers who reached out to me over the years. When I get messages that I impacted your life in some way, its those kinds of compliments that are worth fetching for. There’s a kind of serenity that people respond to as you improve in life. The co-dependency between blogger and the reader is vital. It’s the connection between me and you that brought xppinkx back from the dead. You really lit the fire under my derrière and ignited my passion to create, and for that I thank you. In this digital world are inundated with social media platforms like Youtube, Snapchat, and Instagram. It's hard to know what captures people's attention nowadays. It's comforting to know that you still like to read. Whatever I choose to create, I am moving full steam ahead. With that being said, I am really glad to be back.



To my ride or dies, this one's for you